Yesterday began as a rough day for me. I decided to go have a genetic test to see if I had the same genes that make me a high risk for cancer. As some of you know, my mother died of ovarian cancer when I was 13, and just a few years after that my father was diagnosed with prostate cancer. My father has been cancer free after undergoing a long process of surgery and treatment, so he was extremely lucky and I try to remember that every day.
Because of my depression and anxiety, the nervousness that one experiences doing something like this is compounded. I couldn’t help but think of the worse possible outcome, I was terrified the entire time, and I just could not get a handle on myself. It was all I could do to keep my composure and not burst into tears. I just wanted to go home and hide from everything, cry, scream, anything but talk about the fact that I may have the same genetic compound that could give me cancer.
Then, as if the universe was feeling my pain, something amazing happened.
I was floored. Naturally I was overjoyed, I could not believe that my article was recognized by one of the most popular anime streaming services in the US. It was just the news I needed to get out of this cloud that I was in. Not only was it recognized by Funimation, but a well-known Anime and Manga Vlogger, HappiLeeErin, also shared and tweeted it.
As the title entails, I am humbled and amazed. I want so much to help create a world without the stigma against mental health. I want people to know that this is an illness and it needs to be treated like any other illness. I want people with a mental illness to know that they are loved, that they are important, and that it’s okay to say “I’m hurting and I need help.”
I know that this will be a challenging few weeks but I have my family and friends behind me. I won’t know anything for at least two weeks so there’s nothing left to do but wait.